Heads up! I still have some space in my 2025 Producers Groups. You can learn more in my latest Substack post about them here.
The start of a new year can come with a lot of pressure to create new habits and big plans. Ever since I was a kid, I would make resolutions and promise myself how I would do things differently and better. And then somewhere around mid-February, I would lose steam and abandon ship. Of course, this would make me feel bad about myself. And then I would make a resolution to be better about resolutions next year. What a nutty cycle until I learned to reflect rather than resolve.
Reflection is a powerful tool. It helps you to understand what you’ve learned and what really matters to you. It creates space to recognize what’s working and what’s not. Sometimes, we’ve been stepping on our values or have lost sight of our purpose. Or sometimes our priorities have shifted and we’re not fully conscious of it.
Resolutions have rigidity to them. They can feel black and white, and demand grit and perfection. Studies have shown that resolutions ultimately don’t help us move forward and can deplete our resiliency.
To help you reflect rather than make resolutions, I’ve crafted a journaling exercise using three of my favorite poems, but before I share those prompts, let’s take a quick closer look at resolutions vs. reflection.
Why Resolutions Tend to Fizzle Out
They don’t go deep. Resolutions are usually about what you want to do—exercise more, eat better, work smarter—but they rarely dig into why it’s important to you. And without a “why,” it’s hard to stay motivated when things get messy.
Willpower only gets you so far and eventually, it runs out. And when it does, resolutions tend to fall apart. Taking time to understand yourself can make habits stick in a way that sheer willpower just can’t.
They’re all-or-nothing. Ever missed one gym day and thought, “Well, I guess this week is ruined”? Same. That’s the problem with rigid goals—they don’t leave room for real life.
Why Reflection Feels Better
Looking back at an experience or the calendar year with curiosity and grace can uncover things you didn’t even realize were there. You might spot patterns, figure out what actually makes you happy, or see what’s been holding you back.
Two of the biggest epiphanies I had in reflecting on 2024 was that I have a pattern of underestimating how much time writing assignments take and when faced with uncertainty I get really busy doing things (anything!) to regain a sense of control. As a result, I've been stepping on my values of excellence and listening. By not scheduling enough time for my creative work, I’ve submitted writing which wasn’t fully developed. By not slowing down to listen to myself when the future was not clear, I made impulsive choices like spending time to clean my closet or organize emails rather than sit with my discomfort to make decisions from a place of values.
These reflections are helping me to shape 2025 and get clear on my top three professional priorities: finishing my non-fiction book about grief in the professional realm, re-branding, and growing my socials (to help support the book launch). To that end, after today’s post, I’m going to take a two week hiatus to rest and further reflect. I’ll be back with regularly scheduled programming on Monday, January 20.
Journal Prompts
To support you in reflecting rather than resolving, I’m sharing three poems and twelve journal prompts. The prompts are divided into three sections: the past, the present and the future.
After each prompt, give yourself a minimum of three minutes to write so that you can go beyond what’s on the surface and dig deeper. A trick I use is to not edit myself. Whatever comes up is what I write down even if it’s something like: this is a stupid prompt.
The Past
WILD GEESE by Mary Oliver
You do not have to be good
You do not have to walk on your knees
for 100 miles through the desert, repenting
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
Love what it loves.
Tell me your despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile, the world goes on
Meanwhile, the sun and the clear pebbles of
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees
the mountains and the rivers
Meanwhile, the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely
the world offers itself to your imagination
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh, and exciting --–
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.
Prompt #1: As you reflect on 2024, what is your despair, if any?
Prompt #2: What truths about yourself have emerged, like the wild geese finding their way home? What have you discovered about your inner landscape and the soft animal of your body, loving what it loves during 2024?
Prompt #3. What burdens or despair do you need to release, like the sun moving across the landscape, and what do you want to hold onto as your place in the family of things?
Prompt #4. What word, phrase or metaphor reflects 2024? Why?
The Present
THE DEER by Ama Codjoe
Walking alone in a forest, I came upon
a deer --– this was not a vision.
It faced me, on its fourth and legs,
unmoved as a cave painting
brushed by light. I made myself still.
I spoke to it, softly. I can’t remember
what I said. The dear regarded me as a god would,
eased by my astonishment.
Then, slowly, I moved closer, and the deer
did not run. By now, you know it was love
I walked toward, not the deer, but
what hung in the space between us. I know
it was love because, as I held
my breath, the deer took
a few steps toward me before
bounding into the camouflage
of branches and leaves.
Prompt #5. What hangs in the space, right now?
Prompt #6. Be still. Speak to yourself softly. Get a little closer. What astonishing qualities do you see in yourself?
Prompt #7. What is love? How do you love yourself? How do you love others? How do you walk towards love?
Prompt #8. What word, phrase or metaphor reflects where you are right now? Why?
The Future
YOU SEE I WANT A LOT by Rainer Maria Wilke
You see, I want a lot.
Perhaps I want everything:
the darkness that comes with every infinite fall
and the shivering blaze of every step up.
So many live on and want nothing,
and are raised to the rank of prince
by the slippery ease of their light judgments.
But what you love to see are faces
that do work and feel thirst.
You love most of all those who need you
as they need a crowbar or a hoe.
You have not grown old, and it is not too late
to dive into your increasing depths
where life calmly gives out its own secret.
Prompt #9: As you consider 2025, what do you want a lot?
Prompt #10: What is not too late? What is your secret desire that’s ready to blossom in the new year?
Prompt #11: What depths will you be drawing upon to make your dreams come true?
Prompt #12: What word, phrase or metaphor reflects your vision for 2025? Why?
Bottom Line
Reflection gives us a chance to step back and see the bigger picture. It lets us notice what’s been driving us—both the good and the not-so-helpful—and make choices that feel more intentional. As I think about 2025, I’m finding clarity by asking myself what truly matters and where I want to direct my energy. That’s the beauty of reflection: it helps us tune in and make space for what’s most important. I hope you’ll take some time to reflect too—it can be a powerful way to shape the year ahead. Wishing you health and happiness for 2025.
🙌🏾 Questions? Would you like additional support in accessing resilience? I offer private coaching sessions as well as in-person and virtual group work. Reach out directly here to set up a complimentary consultation.
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