Why Can't I Just Start Today? 😩

If you’re anything like me, you love a good strategic plan. Break it down into action steps. Move through it methodically. Achieve the goal. Live the dream.

Okay, now cue the fairy dust and a violin swell, because that’s mostly the stuff of Harvard Business Review essays and motivational posters.

Here’s the truth: most of us have big dreams and bold moonshots. But following through with ease, flow, and grace? That’s not always in reach—especially when we hit one particular snag: procrastination.

Today, I procrastinated by cleaning a crate of old kitchen stuff, resetting rat traps, folding laundry, and manually expressing my dog’s anal glands. 🤦🏽‍♀️

Why? Because there were things I needed to do—important things—and I didn’t feel confident or capable about doing them.

Also? My routine had been completely thrown off.

🧠 Procrastination Isn’t a Time Problem. It’s a Feeling Problem.

We’re taught that procrastination is about poor time management. That we need better to-do lists or more willpower. But that’s not it.

Procrastination is emotional.

It’s avoidance. It’s fear. It’s that sneaky inner voice whispering, “You’re not good enough to do this yet.”

And honestly—why would you want to tackle something that makes you feel awful? That would take a level of masochism I don’t recommend.

For me, social media and writing are two tasks that invite my self-doubt in with big, open arms.

So I build them into my routine—same time, same place—so I don’t have to think. I just do.

But when the routine is disrupted (hello, jet lag… family curveballs… life), the structure disappears—and those old feelings flood back.

Maybe you’ve felt it too. You had a rhythm—journaling, exercising, developing the pitch for your next big idea. But then life happened. You paused. And now, even the things you want to do feel impossibly hard—because the negative self-talk has kicked up emotions you don’t want to sit with.

👟 So, What Helps?

If procrastination is really about emotional avoidance—then the way through isn’t about trying harder. It’s about making it safe to show up.

Make it safe, and you’ll make it possible.

Here’s what I’ve been trying—not perfectly, but kindly:

🧠 Quit the self-shaming.

No one ever hated themselves into productivity. Beating yourself up just makes the task feel heavier—and gives fear even more power.

One small practice that helps me:

• Name the voice.
  Pause and say, "Oh, that's my shame voice talking."
  It’s not me. It’s not the truth. It’s just the shame.

• Normalize the feeling.
  Remind yourself, "Of course I feel this way. Starting something vulnerable always feels hard."

Naming it and normalizing it takes the pressure off—just enough to actually begin.

💬 Grant grace.

If you could do better, you would do better. Jet lag hit harder than I thought. There’s a family thing draining my energy. This isn’t an excuse—it’s context.

Context softens the blow and reminds you: you’re not failing—you’re human.

📝 Shrink the task.

I’m not writing four blogs today. I’m writing for twenty minutes per blog. Max. No heroics.

Lower the bar. Then walk right over it.

When the task feels smaller, it feels less threatening—and that’s when you can begin.

🍜 Use a reward.

Today’s incentive: ramen brunch + Raisinets for dessert. No notes.

Rewards help your brain associate action with something positive—not just pressure and fear.

⏱️ Try the “just one minute” rule.

Set a timer.
Tackle your task for one minute.
When it goes off—stop. Walk. Breathe.

We’re not chasing perfection here.
We’re just exercising the muscle of showing up.

Because the real win isn’t completing the task perfectly—it’s building a relationship with yourself that feels safe to start again tomorrow.

🧷 Bottom Line:

Procrastination doesn’t mean you’re lazy or broken—it means you’re human.
It’s not about poor time management; it’s about emotional safety.

When a task feels threatening, your brain wants to protect you—not punish you.

A little compassion, a small nudge, and a willingness to begin—badly, briefly, imperfectly—can be enough to make it feel safe to start again.

Make it safe, and you’ll make it possible.

Let ease lead.
Let grace in.
Let the ramen be your reward. 😉

JOURNAL PROMPTS